I don't always go into a lot of details about our life. I usually share what the kids are doing, photos etc. But this is for our baby and I need to get this down so we can always remember.
In June of 2009, our oldest daughter was attacked by a dog. She was in surgery for several hours and will soon be facing more reconstructive surgery. That day seems to mark the beginning of many struggles for our little family. About 2 months after the attack, we learned we were pregnant! We were so thrilled and excited! One week after a positive pregnancy test, the Army told my husband he would be losing his job. See, he was in the Marines when he was younger. Then he became a newspaper reporter, and a darn good one too! But one day he interviewed a man and his wife (who are now dear friends of ours). They had a son in the military, and the dad was now wanting to enlist because he had been so inspired by his son. This inspired my husband. At the time we just had the two girls. He wanted to serve and truly WANTED to be deployed. He wanted another father to stay home with his family for a year. We all fell behind him in 100% support. He had to receive a waiver for his age...he was technically too "old" for the Army. They granted the waiver and he was off to Officer Candidate School! He passed with flying colors, but he was in the very last class that did NOT get to chose which branch they wanted. He was given Armor. He was pleased, he loved those tanks. However, in the grueling school he attended, he just could not make it. He could do the 15 mile ruck marches carrying a 60 pound backpack and a 30 pound gun, but during a 10 day exercise he received a "no-go". We were upset but we were told that he could get rebranched. He was disappointed because he loved Armor, but was excited to get another branch and deploy. To this day we do not know exactly what happened, but he was not allowed to rebranch. So one week after learning we were pregnant....we lost our job. We ended up moving in with my family. He was then awarded a job with a major contracting company and he was going to serve in Iraq for one year under LOGCAP IV. So, we moved into a rental and started doing all that was on our to-do list for him to leave. Then we waited...and waited....and waited. Politics intervened and our contractor lost the bid...so we lost our job....again. Since then we have applied at over 500 places. He has applied for everything from cleaning chicken guts on a 3rd shift job to management positions. About 12 months into our unemployment journey he was given a great job...but it is temporary. In fact, it ends in November. In December all our benefits come to an end and we have no idea what we will do. We are scared and trying so hard to get work. So, we were not trying to get pregnant. But we did. God blessed us with Baby 4. Baby 4 was our surprise baby. The day I found out, it was the first day my husband was working at his temp. job. At first I was a little scared because we had not planned for baby #4. But then excitement took over. I mean, God knew what He was doing and He planned this Baby. I felt overwhelmed with gratitude and I knew, I KNEW, this baby was special. That God had big plan for our baby. My husband felt the same way and we were anxious to welcome this baby into our home. At 7 weeks, I went in for a date confirming ultrasound. The doctor turned on the sound and at 7 weeks pregnant, I saw and heard our baby's heartbeat. I cannot explain what that moment felt like, but I can tell you...I felt God's presence in the room with us. I was watching a miracle. At 7 weeks, some ladies have not even found out they were pregnant and yet there was a beating heart. Amazing. When we got the news at 15 weeks and 3 days that our baby was gone. I felt like my world was crashing around me. How could God give us this baby who was supposed to do great things and then take the baby away? During this journey of healing I learned that our baby can and DOES have a testimony. Our baby will make a difference. Our baby will save at least one life. We have set up a memorial fund in honor of Baby #4. The money will be used to give ultrasounds to ladies who find themselves unexpectedly pregnant. The ultrasound will show them that they are carrying a life inside of them. While I do not want to publicly share the information, if you feel led to donate, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
We are so excited to see how God will use our precious baby to make a difference in the world. Our baby did have a plan and I praise God for the time we had baby #4 in our lives.