Thursday, October 20, 2011

The Club No One Wants to Join

When you first become parents, you feel like you have joined a club.  At least, my husband and I did.  You know, you see another parent dealing with a fussy child and even though they are strangers, your eyes meet and you silently acknowledge..been there done that. 
In the past few days, my husband and I feel we have been forced out of a group and into a club we want no part of.  In our church we were one of five pregnant couples.  Now they all have their babies and ours is in Heaven.  While I am beyond thankful that their babies are safe, we are now out of that group (so to speak).  We have now become part of a club...parents who have lost a baby.  And it is not fun.  Through this, I have been so blessed by others who have come forward and shared their stories.  No two stories are the same.  Every situation was unique and every single lost very well loved.  I will say this, until you have lost a baby you cannot imagine what it feels like, and I pray you never do.  It is a different kind of loss.  Our family feels smaller.  It truly does.  Our family is no longer complete and will not be complete until we are reunited in Heaven.


Trinka said...

was thinking of Psalm 84 - my favorite Psalm. Particularly vs. 5-8:

5 What joy for those whose strength comes from the Lord,
who have set their minds on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem.
6 When they walk through the Valley of Weeping,[b]
it will become a place of refreshing springs.
The autumn rains will clothe it with blessings.
7 They will continue to grow stronger,
and each of them will appear before God in Jerusalem.[c]

When we set our hearts on pilgrimage, it sometimes leads us through the valley of Baca (the valley of weeping). But amidst that valley, our tears become pools of refreshment for those who follow after. This experience is something no one would ever wish to happen, either to themselves, or someone they love. But our fallen, wounded world abounds with pain. And your pilgrimage through this valley will some day offer refreshment and sustenance to someone else who is traveling the same way. As you go from strength to strength, you will lead others behind you on the journey.

Love you guys; thankful for God's sustaining, and comfort.

Kim M. said...

You are's like joining a club you don't want to be in. And while every story is unique, it is oddly comforting to know you're not alone and disturbing at the same time that so many are affected.

Miranda said...

I came over from Sippycups and Fingerprints where Miranda shared your blog. I just wanted to give you a big virtual (hug) and let you know that though I do not know you, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I am in your club too and never wanted or thought I'd ever join. My 4th blessing lives in Heaven as well. She passed away when she was 4 months old, after fighting to live since the day she was born. I also had an early miscarriage last month, just 6 wks after she died. In the coming weeks and months I hope for you to feel the peace that passes understanding and to feel the love of your angel and of the Lord. Somehow, I make it through each day, and many are good because I have 3 little boys too and pray you will too.